don't ask me why i changed the outlook of this blog to something like that, it's not meant to be holy.

it's my life, and it is affected by what i believe in, that happening to be God, and His works.
that is my favourite verse, as it reminds me what i should do, because i have a debt i will never clear, and i'm but a mere sinner.

it saddens me, some of these things that have happened in the past 2weeks. some new things i've learnt. but there have been ups too, cause i did spend time with my family.

school starts in 2 days. new year comes in less than 24hours. and i've still got all my work untouched. hmmm.. will complete econs today since it's the least, and easiest too i believe.

well, to you all people out there, blessed new year.
and for those i do know as friends, it's my wish that the next year for our friendships would be more exciting if not as great as it has been. thank you all, wj, fun, chrislump, piglet, val, rome, and sam, yeah, if you do read this, i do hope we go spend more time together like we used to. (not necessarily playing pool right? hahaha, i'm thinking of cutting down on it this year)

loving you all.

it's been so long.

do i owe this to anyone? nope. =)

do i want to do it? i guess so, that's why you're reading this now.

am i compromising myself? maybe i am, with all these underlying peer pressure, but then again, i've always thought i was the one who exerted peer pressure rather than be influenced by it.

i'm thinking. about sec2 basketball camp. it's been so long, but i still remember the night i messaged so much, and one particular message, but then again, i don't think it's remembered by the other person.

i'm tired, i'm going to sleep. it's 4 in the morning.

This is dedicated to all who have learnt in one way or another tonight, with the events that have happened in their lives.

Tonight,
is a special night.

I've come to learn,
that my life,
essentially boils down,
to two sole beings,
if i'm worth that title.

Amidst the anger,
and vehement vibes i am oozing of now,
i feel different.
Quoted from a good book,
i'm probably doing what it called
"detaching myself".

I struggle to let God lead,
but i do admit many a time,
i force myself upon the captain's position.

Education's a selfish concept,
it is for one's self.

i admit i am a selfish,
arrogant,
materialistic,
prudish,
bastard who might be falling into the mould of that particular Mr Tan,
but!
screw him, and screw you all who think i would pity myself, or anyone else
simply because of the way things are.

i will not forget you not wanting to soil your hands. no worries.

God and i. things i've learnt, many others i would in future.

A special night,
tonight is.

-rt

Good morning to God, and the beautiful world that He's created. =)

hey hey, it's OP assessment this week. wish everyone all the best. darn, it's 0701hrs, and i'm up already, on a monday. that's cause i'm going to be part of wj's audience, and she's presenting at 8.

*mutter mutter*, and there's GPF filling to do at 10. hope it doesn't take too long, cause i need to meet rome for the ice breakers, and team spirit building games. i could use some help here, anyone?

yay! man united won 2-1. hahaha. i've been thinking last night since steph asked me why i was anti-liverpool, and i realised i've just stumbled two people, joy and steph. this is how it goes, if you're wondering what i'm talking about.

well, like it or not, the world's greatest thing is love, and love is God. 1 John 2: 1-14. just went through that verse in the sanctuary this morning. and apparently the part about claiming to walk in the Light, and yet i hate my brother, i'm but a liar.

brother here meant so many things to me, cause i knew, and still know, that there are many people in my life, that i don't like.

i guess this is one area i should ask God to come into too. =) will keep that in mind.

love is a concept that requires more than one. i'm thankful i ain't alone on this earth, and i'm confident God knows what love is, from the start, simply because he's three in one. The Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit.

i learnt this apart from many things as i'm attending baptism classes.
quite a lot more to say, but i have to leave the house now, cause papa's ready. =) hahahaha, ciaos all.

on a serious light note, i'm really glad she's come back. hope she stays though.

*hillsongs - Heart of worship*

so much has happened in the past few days. maybe all these things go on everyday, but hardly any attention's given to them

i must say, i have, and am still growing closer to Him, and i'm thankful. i'm glad i know why i pray, and whom i pray to.

john lin. my new friend. christian attending BRMC. ACJC. plays pool much better than i do, and has opened up my vision about the whole game. thank you john.

i learnt the hard way that one day of not talking to Him can make myself so much more susceptible to temptation of any sort, to fall away from Him. i hope i don't have to go through that ever again. i've realised i yearn to talk to, and spend time with Him. i guess i'm beginning to see the value of this relationship i have.

some people think that the things they do, result in other changes, and it's all linked up, and things keep changing. however, i think it ain't that case from a certain point of view.
when we fall away, he doesn't love us any less, we don't become any less saved, and the only reason why we feel 'changed', is cause sin is deceptive. it's the devil's best trick, by making us bound ourselves once again to the chains of guilt.

learn that all sin has been paid for. the past, present, and future. don't argue with it, it's been proven.

howard. my new friend too. school mate. a man of great obedience, and faith. he lent me iLumina, which i hope would help me study the Bible better. he passed me some notes on spiritual gifts too.

i spent close to a hundred bucks in 2 days. i need to do some accounting.

i'm off to talk to Him now. hope it would be like the times i play and enjoy, cause time wouldn't be of a concern to me then. =)

i wanted to post some stuff i wrote, but i got distracted, and i need my sleep to recover, so i ain't putting it up anymore. good night all you souls out there.
*i still feel by His side is where i belong*.. =|

*in a state of pain; growing numb to it as the minutes tick by, but it's hurting*

my throat! arGh! that's what's hurting. darn!

don't know what's wrong also. hmmmm.. maybe cause i haven't been drinking enough, but the thing is, it hurts to swallow now, so i don't know how i'm supposed to drink more water..

i bought my new columbia jacket cum wind-breaker. it's nice. i like it, and that's what matters i think. =) i ain't no rich kid, or i would have gotten the other one. it cost $129. nah uh, out of muah league.

i'm going to rest early tonight. i need it, or rather, my throat needs it. i shall attempt to endure the pain of swallowing, and down a mug of water before i go to bed.

all those out there who are sick, if i know you, and i know that you're unwell, i pray the Lord heal you soon. if i don't know you, get well soon.

-gosh, i forgot that the other parts of my body's hurting too, my bicep, and shoulder.. sigh.. i think i'm dying. we're all dying-

i think i did no wrong, so i ain't going to apologise.
till anyone faults me convincingly, that i shouldn't have done what i did, i ain't about to say sorry.

it's not a matter of pride, it's not bowing to anyone and everyone simply just cause i'm the SCpresident. if things worked that way, i quit. but i'm thankful they don't. hahaha

sleep is nice, i like sleeping. haha, and i like eating too. kinda pigged out with my mother and brother today. hahaha, dinner for the 3 of us came up to 30bucks worth of hawker food. hahahaha it was cool!

*drowsy*
well, i don't feel like saying anymore. good night people.

went out with ah wong and Yy today. hahaha.

didn't get to talk as much as i would have liked to ah wong, but it's cause he's got open house tomorrow, and i've got the young leader's thingy thingy tomorrow.
argH!

darn, i can't believe my dad ain't going to celebrate his birthday this year. it's so sad. =\ all cause of a quarrel, and of all things, over results..

hmmm.. i hope to go out with my friends to go talk. i missed the days i went out with other friends just to talk, maybe it's built over time, and i can't force it, but i don't know, i can't help missing times of the past if they were good right? i miss my church youth friends lots, but they've got their own lifes, josh and andrew, yeah they do with their gfs. i'm happy for them.. i really am.

i don't know if i would get to go out for cheese cake with clare tomorrow, cause we've got differing time schedules. so yeah, if it was meant to be, it was meant to be. let's see whether it was meant to be yeah clare? do tell me.. =)

i'm glad i'm getting on fine or at least better with my classmates now. hmmm.. some of them do still get on my nerves, i'm trying. still trying. but at least i'm talking to someone now, and it's an improvement.

hmmmm.. am i really drowning myself in unimportant things in life?
my mother claims i'm obsessed with pool.. and spending money, too much of it, on materialistic things.
i admit i spend lavishly on things that mostly are wants rather than needs, but where do i draw the line?
just spoke to my jiejie about spending money, came up with some plans. hope to implement it from tomorrow. *need a small notepad*

hmmm.. i'm undergoing baptism classes, yet there're issues i need to sort out with myself. i really hope things get going. i feel stagnated. i feel like a resounding gong, there's no more meaning like there was. yeah i may be getting on fine -or maybe not so fine- with my studies, and friends, and play etc etc. but i feel empty. i know what's causing it, but yet i don't feel drawn to the solution. please help me.

i think i talk too much sometimes, and i put on a fake front. i don't want to be this way. i want to be me.

i don't want to say things that i feel better afterward for saying them; i don't want to live in the state of regret for what i say, do, think about, and decide upon.

Matchstick Men was good. it was interesting, and the ending was simple but sweet. things happen in life, and as i often say, life's a fair game. i hope i come to terms with that soon.. but on a good note, i don't think i'll ever understand that, cause God's been more, much much more than fair to me. thank You.

-Dehydrated-

it's Deepavali today. haha. =)

had a minor celebration today in school, learnt some new things about the occassion. interesting.

played pool today too, and played well. maybe it was the company i had on the way home that spurred me on. hahaha. i was quite happy today

God answered my prayers today, and maybe it was by chance, but i choose to see it as Him working. PE was a blessing. hahaha. =) if you're interested to find out what i'm talking about, then ask me.

hmmm.. the sad thing is, it's my papa's birthday, and my parents quarrelled, over my brother's results. i don't know what to say, and i don't want to say anything with regards to the quarrel. i have some reflection on my own part to do.

*eyes tearing, and sniffling* i think it's cause i'm tired. i've been so, but i don't really care. not for now at least. i ain't got no time to care for myself now.

Good night people. maybe i'll go down another mug of water and some mango before i sleep.

i attended my first baptism class today, and i just had dinner.

haha.

i've learnt some old new things. yeah, it's kinda like an oxymoron. i knew God but i didn't know Him, you know that sorta thing? haha

i don't know why i've been so tired these past few days, my body's been drained, and i sleep quite a bit nowadays. hope it wears off soon, since school would be going back to full swing in no time.

i recieve my papers back tomorrow, so as many of my school mates would *cross fingers* - i hope i would be able to accept what i get with grace, acknowledging that these grades i recieve, work for the good of His glory, and not mine.

i'm talking to a friend, and she told me she blogs too. hahaha, but she stagnated, cause she's lazy.

why should i feel i owe it to my friends who read my blog that i should update everyday, or at least once a week? you see, the point is, i don't.
i feel that no one's obligated to update on a regular basis, since it's your own form of a journal, one that you share with others.
i feel that blog owners decide when to write, what to write, and how to write it. =) no strings attached.

haha, i wish all mjc people the best, for tomorrow when we recieve our results. take care everyone, good night. =)

she set the tone right, and it turn out well for the session... where we go from here, i hope we all would chip in to make it turn out good.

Force: Newton
Weight: Newton
Height: m/cm
Committment : Sacrifce

hmmm.. i think i've learnt alot last night from terrence, and lots from sarah today too. =)

i thanked God for placing all those i come in contact with in my live, especially for the nice ones. and i think my councillors are nice people. i want to grow with them, and i hope what was mentioned today wouldn't be mere talk. i'm entrusting it to God, and i hope He leads me where i would lead my council.

thank you.

Good morning to you all, though the house's empty, and the streets are probably too, cause it's a schoolday, and most meridians are having SAT lecture now.

fun: this is for you! thank you so much for what we spoke about last night. =)

*ponders what's there to eat...*

hmm... sustinence. hahahaha... so important, yet something we singaporeans take for granted most of the time, and what we christians take for granted too pertaining to our maintainence of our walks with God.

i still haven't spoken to Him, and it's quiet now. real quiet. the absence of any life forms at home apart from me does make it quiet doens't it? besides, it's raining, and the construction work isn't going on, so i should talk now shouldn't i? since i said i liked it to be quiet..

yeah i would. =)

ciaos.

WOAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i think i'm SO blessed. hahaha and i thank God for it.

i just went on a shopping spree with my papa.
hahaha, we went to sim lim square, and i bought 2 new games.
C&C generals + ZeroHour, and Jedi Academy. =) i also bought a new pair of headphones that comes with an integrated mike, from Altec Lansing. (oh, and i got a Battle Pad Pro free - that's a gaming mousepad)

then we proceeded to Davis Guitar shop. bought 3 new cables for all the guitars at home, 16bucks each, and a new leather strap. it's so beautiful, and i chose it.

hahaha, i just have this thing for leather lah. yay!

hmmm.. account check! we spend approx $310. and i was quite shocked that he was willing to buy me my headphones and games, but he thought i deserved it for my efforts in my promos. i seriously hope my results don't disappoint me. *cross fingers* but nevertheless, i know whatever grades i get would be for the glory of God.

i'm happy, i would start gaming soon, and probably thru the night, since there isn't much to be done in school tomorrow. hehehe. =)

i hope things happen, but i would just be an observer.. i don't wanna initiate the happening of them, but if they do, i ain't going to stop them.

"when the going gets tough, Jesus will still be there.. " - POG

WOAH!!!!!!!!!!

it's a new begining to a long road, another jumpstart with the events that have happened in a really really really really longgggggggggggg time to come.

the last time i updated, it was 12th june, and now, it's already the 10th of Oct. hahahaha

being able to update this friday morning, marks almost the end of my J1 days, cause it's the last paper of the first even promotional exams that Meridian Junior College has had. hahaha, it's 45mins to the end of the paper.

hmm.. i have a good night's rest, and i wonder whether others had too, especially those friends with lit paper this morning. but anyway, they're all so good at it, hahaha.

it is coincidental how something happens one night, and i happen to read my own blog updates about what i typed a long time ago.

give me a minute, yeay, here's what i'm referring to

"in life, there will be people you like, and others you don't like as much, but i believe a precious lesson i've learnt in this camp, is that people are people, and they don't depend on you, so why not have an extra friend rather than an enemy. =)
[ Thu Jun 12, 09:01:42 AM

haha, that was my last entry, and it's probably God's way of telling me something. alot has happened, alot has been said, i feel that i post my updates here becuase i'm part of this affluent society, that invests heavily in technology that serves more to tear down rather than bridge people closer. hahaha. indeed GP is over for this year, but not forever. =)

do what you wish, just don't lose yourself - Avilyn 2003 (that's my sister by the way) hahahaha

3 days of camp!!!!

TGIO!!!!! hahaha, that being Thank God it's OVER!!!! hahaha, but thank Him it was Ok too. yeah, indeed it was. a great time of learning, and sharing, and self-sacrificing.

to be in a member of a group made up of leaders, that indeed was something new for me. i've always like leading, but through this camp, i've learnt that sometimes, i just have to 'not lead' due to the circumstances. yeah.

hmmm, i've grown closer to quite a few people, especially those within the council. i remembered how a few of us were ridiculing about why the councillors were grouped in 2 major groups, without any other memebers within our groups of 8 respectively, but at the end of the camp, i realised why. the objectives set out intially were met to, and i'm happy they were.

in life, there will be people you like, and others you don't like as much, but i believe a precious lesson i've learnt in this camp, is that people are people, and they don't depend on you, so why not have an extra friend rather than an enemy. =)

i hope to recuperate my energy mentally and physically today, cause lessons start tomorrow. a next obstacle would be the Mid-Years. in 2.5weeks time, they happen. alright now, i have to go.

ciao everyone, just continue being yourself, so long it brings more joy to the people who like you, and brings less pain to those who can't accept you for who you are.

-did i tell you i missed you?-

CLAO, C math, Econs, are down. i'm left with physics to go.

hmmm... time really flies. and i'm thankful i'm left with physics only. econs was pretty much a letdown, let's hope for a better result from physics. CLAO and Math was good though. shouldn't have problems passing both. esp my math, since i failed my math test with a miserable 10/40, therefore if i pass, it's already a onefold inprovement. the CLAO paper proved something, and that is if i pay attention in class very closely, there isn't much revision to do, because i would absorb really well. hmmm, will take that that into account. but then again, i always pay attention during lectures. haha. =)

hmmm, i feel like eating pizza, after watching you few people eat it in the canteen, but i don't think they will have any more 1 for 1 offers on the rest of the week. i also wanna eat the buddy meal from kfc again. although the block tests are coming to an end, i am happy, but, there's a certain sad feeling in me. when the block tests are over, the library won't be opened till 9 everyday again, and i'm kinda disappointed. i think it's a very healthy start for MJC to actually start study sessions like this. no doubt there would be some jokers who don't actually study when they stay back in school, but when i see those who do, it gives me hope that one day, MJC would be in the top rungs of this hierachy of ranking. -all great things have humble beginnings- =)

i'm really glad i've chosen to be part of this pioneer batch of MJC. although it feels empty to walk into school everyday not to see an emblem of a sort or a crest for that matter, and sing only the national anthem everyday of the week without being able to look forward to singing the school song, it instills in me a want to make sure that as the pioneer batch, i want to do things right, i want to create a culture, a legacy that i can look back to, one that my juniors can look up to. =)

so long folks for now, i believe i've said quite a lot. some of you may think it's rubbish, but as long as i know i cherish these thoughts deep inside my mind, i'm happy, and that's what matters to me and some other people.

-never knew i could feel like this,
like i never seen the sky before,
want to vanish inside your kiss,
everyday i love you more and more,
listen to my heart,
can you hear it sing,
telling me to give you everything,
seasons may change,
winter to spring,
but i'll love you,
untill the end of time.

come what may,
come what may,
i will love you,
untill my dying day.-

-trials and tribulations we may go through, but at the end of each one, i always learn something new. i learn that i cherish you more than i thought i did. =)-

-friday night- what happened to those nights i would meet sean to go for pool? they seem so far away, haha, but i guess life has moved on, and i'm glad about that.

i'm tired, but the day has been fufilling. my homwork's starting to pile up though, and i don't know how i'm going to handle 3 Alevel subjects in 7 days left to my block test. there's an econs test tomorrow, and that's probably the thing that's giving me the jitters right now. i'm really begin to dislike the journey everyday home from school, especially when i'm alone.

7 days to block tests and counting..

it's labour today, and on the contrary to the idea of resting from labour, many people slogged their day away with tutorials and more tutorials. i on the other hand, think that i pretty much wasted my day away slacking. haha, but at the end of the day -now, 1131pm- i feel i have completed a substantial amount of work.

i re-drafted my econs data response as Mr Naresh requested the class to do, studied for a tentative chinese mini-test tomorrow, and filled up my physics lecture notes. i'm still stuck on my math though, maybe i will source for tuition or a tutor. maybe maybe maybe. hahaha. =)

in the last 2 days, i've been touched by the wonders of friendship. people whom i thought i knew have actually drawn away, and new friends whom i thought were quite cold began to thaw. hehehe, no offence yeah to you guys out there? it's just that i find it heart warming. here's something dedicated to all my new friends at MJC, you guys know who you are.

-God loves us, and he shows it in many ways, one of which, is by placing those miraculous people in your lifes; to uphold you when you're down, to credit praise when it's due, and simply to love you for whom you are. friends.-

i'm suffering from mal-nourishment, but not that of the medical term, i'm so fat, no way could i be under nourished, hahaha, but it's other issues i'm speaking of. hahaha, thank you for my daily dosages/supplements of your warmth. =)

alright then, good night folks, hope that you guys have a great friday ahead of you.

-class bbq, i don't know whether i'm looking forward to it or otherwise.-

i have so much homework to do today, and my name was taken down by the math teacher Mrs Quek, for not having done my AP tutorials. i'm quite screwed.

but enough of the bad things of the day. hehe. =)

H&F people are nice, and a pretty cheery bunch. i like the activities they do, and although it's nothing compared to training for any of the major sports like basketball or soccer, i feel that if i enjoy myself, that's all that really matters.

i'm going to re-attempt my econs tutorials, cause i didn't really do them with my full concentration, and it's no wonder i made so many mistakes. =\ but i guess it's good that i learnt. heheh, i'm made new friends again! =) yeay! hehehehe, and val made me her older brother. hahaha, that mad woman, but she's very pleasant to talk to and be with.

issues, issues, and more issues, what's the world coming to? it was the war, now sars, and now the vegetables that are missing on my dinner table. this is quite an ominous sign ok? i've been brought up to eat greens every meal since young whenever i ate at home. it's from this practise that my love for veg came about, and to have meals nowadays without this essential item, it leaves me feeling empty. haha.(maybe i am an empty vessel, that's why i talk so much.)

i think it's digusting, downright disgusting that #MJC on irc ain't owned by any of our own students, but by some prick from ITE, who can't even speak proper english! gosh!
arGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and the worst thing, they befoul the school, but advertising for their friends about their other channels, and the products they're selling, like computers, etc. =(

learning to accept one for him/herself is something i should learn to do, but not just yet *evil grin*

hahaha, and i'm also happy that i kept to the promise i made to myself today!! yeay! i didn't comment anything un-constructive today about anyone, not even some of the more prominent characters i talk to my friends about in school. hahaha, lala. =) -self control-!!!!!

so long people, i have work to do, and yes, life as an A level student, is fast and fiery, but it's fun and enriching too. =) ciao.

-what's it with a guy talking to a girl? can't friends just be friends? gosh!-

no, no one's said anything cause i've made new girl friends, but i'm just wondering, do girls always think that just cause a guy approaches her to speak to her, he must be courting her?

sheesh, wake up! there're people who look for friends, and treasure them for who they are, and not some conquests that just add to the list.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Man U VS Arsenal ----> i'm catching this!!!!!!! but 230am in the morning, nevermind, i shall turn in early, awaken to watch the match, and do work till it's time to go to school.

my thighs are starting to ache. so the workout yesterday did have it's effects. don't know why it took so long to come.

i'm hoping dinner today will be good, so that i can enjoy it, then do my homework. i need to finish the chinese homework, and also physics tutorials. (haven't practised on my piano in 3 days, shouldn't push it anymore. will practise tonight)

i joined H&F. =) hahaha

i'm really outta shape, hope this gets me back into my tip top health condition, although i know it wouldn't be as effective as basketball training.

today was ok on the whole, i watched soccer in the wee hours of the morning, good game. school was ok, but the talks were boring. thank God lessons start tomorrow. =)

i think i need a good night's rest so that i can concentrate well tomorrow on my physics. i'm lagging so much and when i read thru the notes, i'm stunned, gosh, i'm actually blurred too. =\

hope this lag doesn't drag on for too long, i hope to do well for my mid years and promos. i want to.

alright now, i shall go sleep, enjoy the night you all out there. =)

you can reach me by railway,
you can reach me by trailway,
you can reach me on an airplane,
you can reach me with your mind
you can reach me by caravan,
cross the desert like an arab man,
i don't care how you get here,
just get if you can.

you can reach me by sailboat,
climb a tree,
swing rope to rope,
take a slope and slide down into these arms of mine.
you can jump on a speed code,
cross the border in a leather robe,
i don't care how you get here,
just get here if you can.

Oleta Adams - Get here (chorus)

nice song.

my mum has left for Rome. hope she gets there safely and back. i'm still pissed with her, but not that furiously anymore.

arGh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i have just been given 250 for my allowance when it's supposed to be 350. F***! i feel like punching someone, anyone! arGh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

damn it!!!! what's her screwed up rational? it ain't my problem that my brother starts school only next week therefore he gets an allowance cut. i start on wed!. damn it, damn her! *boils*

thank God she's leaving for Rome tomorrow, good riddance to bad rubbish for ten days. screw it..

-as i seat in my computer chair facing my monitor that causes me to look in the direction that's out of my window-

it's as i'm at a press conference of some sort, with the lightning flashes that simulate flashes from cameras that come repetitively.

*leanne rimes - please remember plays in the background*

haha, having made a new friend who's shared pretty much with me has made my day, although it started in the wee hours. i slept at 4plus in the morning, awaken at 1030 by my mother who's peculiar about people sleeping in late, especially her own children.

i'm what you would call a couch potatoe now i guess, i only use the com, watch some tv, eat, and sleep. Literally, sounds disgusting to me, does it to you? I think i shall go pick up a book later on.

I'm glad i downloaded Primal Fear starring Richard Gere. i read the book, it was magnificent! but the storyline's twisted! sick stuff, so unless you're strong in your mind, don't even try picking up that book..

The rain's starting to lighten up, but the sky colour's not changing, still that pale yellow that makes everything look so sickly. =( [it's making me depressed]

Also, there's news that the suspension would be extended to the 14th, and the verdict looms ominously. For those of you who's prarents are fine with you going out, i pray you take care of yourselves. My parents grounded me, for my own good indeed, but it's killing me too, though in a different way.. =\

Alright, i shall go ermm.. fix something to eat first, then i'll go take a bath.

cheerios.

i'm waiting for my movies to finish downloading.

1. enemy at the gates.
2. daredevil
3. primal fear
4. chicago

these are the four i'm currently downloading, aka pirating from Kazaa. hahaha. =p

i love cable, at least in the area i stay, cause few or hardly any people use cable, so i get most of the bandwidth.

for those techies out there, here's a good webbie for you. www.bandwidthplace.com it checks your bandwidth for you, esp if you're on broadband by singnet or pacnet. you signed up for 512kbps? you better check again. hahaha. *evil grin*

i am so bored.. and i feel like playing the guitar, but i have nothing new to play on it. it's always those few songs, and those few chords. boring!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! arGh!!!!!

i seriously hope they don't extent the suspension of school due to the SARS virus. this is sickening!

i realise i have been very short-fused lately, i will keep check of it in the days to come, i hope. -at least i wanna try ok?-

so long now folks. this is all i have for my evening entry of my blog. =)

i am not going for my OG outing, and again, cause of the SARS virus.

-weird dreams i had during my sleep-

dreams are.....

i) some say a subconcious reflection upon what's happened in the day. (so if i don't dream does that mean that i didn't do anything in the day that's meaningful enough for me to reflect upon?)
ii)i feel that they deprived you of your rest. that's why i hope i don't dream when i sleep. it defeats the purpose of sleeping. having dreams as goals are different from dreams that are not real. comprehendo?

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i had decided to spoil myself in the morning since i'm incarcerated at home! hahaha, so i had waffles with butter and maple sauce for breakfast. =)

lunch was unagi with bacon omelette and rice. solid lunch! -i salivate at the thought of having eaten that-

hahaha, i shall laze around like the pig i already am, and i would spend most of the day listening to music, using the com, or watching tv.

*life's too short to sulk away, so enjoy it. =) *

-restrain is a choice that sophisticated minds exercise freely-

that's probably what's stopping from cursing out at the world whole with everything i've got, at anyone and everyone! arGh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WHEN is this damn virus going to be stopped? i'm not even allowed out for sport now. gosh!

i shall sleep! then i won't have to think of all these crap. *sheesh*

haha

i'm trying out new stuff on my comments box, so please bear with me.

and it's times like this i wonder who i can trust.

a hundred people on the bus whom have no malicious intentions may be the very cause of my death, but i guess if it happens then it was meant to be.

this a new test for something old...