i got my shure e2c's. they're babies, and they're good babies =) hahahaha
can you tell i'm a happy boy? i'm telling you i am =p
i got my new Remo drum pad to practise on too. hoping to improve.
34days to A levels.

36 days.

mooncakes are nice, but i could do away with the racket that the GRC gathering downstairs's causing.
i've got half a TJC p1 left, and 2 new DRQs. should i attempt to finish everything tonight? i seriously need help with my math..

i got back most of my prelim results on the first day of school. haha.
they aren't fantastic, but i've made improvement, and i'm really thankful for my Math grade. =)

thus far, i've got:
B4 for GP,
D for econs,
aO for math,
and my physics grade is unknown as of today.

haha, it's not pretty, but to me, it's a good start, of the 37 days left to my A levels. cool huh. =)
well, we'll see what God can do in thus short a time, with a willing soul (hopefully =p)

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wah, jie mei's camera just spoilt, cause someone dropped it, *ouch*
but i seriously think you should get the one that Ne got. she got it at $1299, and you're getting it at $599, if i were you, i would grab it. it's like what? 4Megapixel? that's more than enough for me man.. i'm not shutterbug, so yeah.

well, here's the homework list for today.
1. TJC math paper 1
2. J2002 Econs P2, Drq Qn 1 on belgium and it's economy.

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oh yeah, i'm getting my allowance this friday, and this is what i plan to spend on for this month. it sets me back quite a bit, but hey, for quality of my music, why not man?

http://www.shure.com/earphones/images/e2c_big.jpg

hahahah.. till laters people =)

question of the day: should one be allowed to feel sad from time to time?

if you have an answer to this, share it with me?
i'm caught in this cycle, and i'm getting quite sick of it.
happy out of home, and upset in it.
realised i used home and not house? it's still cause i know something's wrong.
there used to be warmth, love, and a looking-forwardness to home, the smell of it, the feel of it.

-a selfish streak
-a can't be bothered attitude
-playing too much
-sleeeping too much

just some of the topics the nagging's been going on and on for and about.
come on, if it ain't there, they won't nagging.
i have come to terms with that, but i don't understand, and so i have yet to come to terms with other things.

it's been like that when i'm close to You, it's also been like that when you're so far away.
so which is better off?
i haven't been speaking to You the whole of this week, is this why all these is happening? but it happens even when i'm talking to You practically every segment of the day. so what's up?

------------------------------------------

then:
*finger points* Look at your brother, learn from him, he's so caring, so loving, yada yada..

now:
*finger points* Look your YOUR brother, learn from HIM, HE's so caring, considerate, yada yada.. what happened to YOU?

you get the flow?
let me attempt to explain.
in the former ten years ago, the finger was pointed at me.
in the latter, now, the finger is pointed at my brother.

i admit, i've grown up, to be a different boy from who i used to be.

i don't think of others like i used to think of asking josie to the table to join us for dinner.
i don't exercise my initiative to hang the clothes, mop the floor, or water the plants for that matter.
i've lost that angelic innocence.
i've gained my PSLE results, O level results, and grade 8 distinction in my piano.
i've gained a whole lot of pride in myself, haughtiness, condescension upon others.
i've learnt to satisfy myself before others, and i claim i've learnt to love over the past few relationships i've had, but in retrospect, it's bullshit, with the exception of Julia.

so what if i bother to open up doors for girls? or make sure they get home safely? or let them up the escalator or the bus before i do? it surmounts to ziltch. look at it in this light, what's often termed as "desireable" by others, can be actions simply acted out without the heart in it. the devil knows the entire bible, he knows God even better than i do, but he ain't got the heart, that's why he's who he is.
- this is reason number 1 why i'm so thankful i don't reciprocate the feelings that the poor innocent girl has for me. she doesn't know me, and i'm glad she doesn't.

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only with confession does worship follow suit after a calamity.
realignment can only take place when the recognition for the need to do so is born.
i want to, yes i'm making a choice.
God help me with it. this i beg of you. yes i do.

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the ecstasy of the flesh throws the mind into a fumble, and in turn leads the spirit along with the temple into wayward deeds. steer thyself away from what tempts, unless it is in line with what the Holy Spirit prompts. gorge out your eye if it's what causes you to sin. hold your tongue if it's what causes hurt, and remain silent till words of wisdom, love, assurance and edification is poured forth from the very same tongue.
Love will triumph over all, good and evil.
Amen.

gosh.. whee!~

hahaha, i wonder whether this glee is ever going to be justified.
hMmmmm.. hahahahahahahaha.... ~!~!~! =p

good night people, and all the best to all taking physics prac tomorrow.

The Calling - Wherever you wil go

it doesn't take any more than 2 rejections flat in the face for an ego to feel flatten.
right, it wasn't their faults that they were busy, and had to rush off, yes, and i ain't blaming anyone. i'm just feeling... well.. rejected.

i read this off someone's nick, and i thought it was really insightful.
"when you recieve an insult, top it. if you can't top it, laugh it off. well, if you can't even laugh it off, it's probably deserved."

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gosh.. tempers flying again.. darn it.
what a turn off.

a skin of copper
a sky of grey
a curtain of white
and a heart of gloom

miscommunication. sigh, i'm upset because of that. thankfully none of them read this.
gosh..
Lord i ask that you seek my motive and correct me if i habour wrong intentions for wanting to do what i did. i'm at a loss, teach me, and guide me Lord.

i've been writing alot, so much so that i'm actually quite shocked how i'm able to finish a long tube of pelikan blue ink in a week. need to get a refill. i think the uncle will be darn shocked too.

well, most of my writing has been actually my conversations with God, and my thoughts. so in a way, i've been talking alot too.

it's 2 days to my unofficial end of my prelims. i think i'm going to screw up big time, but with God's grace, i'll pull through.

i think i'm posting here cause i know there're people out there who read, and care, but i'm sorry, i can't tell you all in words like that. if you need my assurance, i'm doing well, and i'm actually very good =) thanks to God.

i'm still looking around for a leather bound journal, anyone know where i could get it? in singapore that is.
please please please let me know if you do have resources. thank you.

i'm so bloated, from the Macs dinner i just had, and the large mug of chinese tea i had. haha. hmmm.. it's econs paper1 and 2 tomorrow, shall go revise now, although i'm more worried about my math paper2. tsk tsk.. *anxiety kicks in* and i kick it out of the window, nah. i hand it to God =) thank You.

for those of you who think He's but a servant whom i go to for my woes and troubles and things like that, you have no idea what great fun we're having together. don't understate the value of something you cannot comprehend. =)

took out the music, changed the layout, let me know what you think of it yeah?

i think sometimes things get too complicated in the midst of we trying to make it simple. want an example? take a statistical analysis for example. who actually needed to know all those figures and pie charts and fractions? i sure didn't need to.

good night people for now.

What do you call collectively,
That the eye can see,
heads turning to appreciate beauty as she walks down the streets,
That the ear can hear,
the majesty of children all singing praises unto Him that send a warm tingle down your spine,
That the nose can smell,
the whiff of mother's love from the kitchen as i step home,
That the tongue can taste,
the sweetness of sugar in the richness of coffee,
That our skin should feel,
the millions of messages our bodies tell each other in a unified tone of a hug that's long overdue?
i call it God's love for me.

thanks to cassandra from MMC. got it from enlin though. hmm.. one performance i'll never forget.
immortalized in writing, fossilized in pictures.

bought a new pen, and have been writing in a diary. hope i continue to, even in the midst of my exams. well, nothing much to say for now, because i've written most of my thoughts for the day down in the my diary.
take care people and have fun.

*why should stress as a result of limited human understanding preceed faith hope and love?

so weird, all these feelings i have in me now.
it may have been the excessive amounts of caffeine, or maybe the people i spoke to through the night, or maybe cause i slept at 5am in the morning, or maybe cause of a show i re-watched.
in any case, i'm feeling melancholic.

i need my haircut, and i need to study.
will go for it later on, but i'm considering studying outside. i'm just wondering.. hmmm..

i've learnt so many new things in the last 3 days of my life, that i'm pretty much overwhelmed by my emotions. i ain't so sure it's time to be going through this.

Lord, i ask you be with me. my legs are feeling very jelly-like.

if there's one thing worse than not having friends, it would be that your friends ignore you.

had a good night's sleep, and had a good breakfast with my brother. got bad news though that my sister's apartment was broken into last night, but thankfully apart from a few missing things, all else is fine.
plan to do my QT before starting on a math paper today.

*i ask that this day be productive and that you help me appreciate the little things you've done in my life..

some say blogging helps, others gorge, yet others shop, but i think all don't work for me, and i personally op for sleep. at least i don't waste money or time doing something only to realise later that i regret it.
who can regret sleeping?

ah screw it.
yeah, screw it.
don't you get me? screw it!
ok, let me spell it out for you one last time.
S.C.R.E.W I.T!

i think i used like 50msgs in half an hour, so that time 3, i used 150msgs over dinner.
i don't really care about it anyway.
i need my shower, and my bed.

*a voice lingers in the head,
and for that moment,
language doesn't matter,
only the voice does.*

ever felt anything like that before?
well, don't answer, cause it wasn't meant to be answered.

ok, no, it's not some screw up on the database. yes it's been really quite some time now since i've stepped down, but just felt like posting the pictures only now. so yeah. i would be posting up the Love Meridian Day pics too.

nostalgia. our 1st pose together in school uniform, and the last together, in blazers.

right after the step down..

see the smiles?

Mr Tee's idea again.. =p

i wonder what the wall will be like by the time the next president steps down.

nostalgia, love, friendships, bonded, unity, happiness, laughter, smiles, and tears, are some of the words that have been flashing past my mind.

from all the posts that i read, from the pictures i see, from the memories i have, yes, i end up crying inside, but with both tears of joy and sorrow.
joy for the appreciation that we were once there,
sorrow for the knowledge that it must come to an end.

i think to say you people rock, i understate the true value of what you guys mean to me.
well, i'm not at a loss of words, because i know i want to tell you people i love you all.
yes s303, i do love you guys.
that my love sprung from my only hate, now i feel the stabs of bittersweet sorrow.

i have more to say, but i don't think it's the time to do so now. i don't want to write about these things when i'm so tired, when i fail to express what i truly feel, and i dim the hues of the colours that you people brought into my life. help me be fair to you people.
que sera sera.