Hoobastank - The reason (the whole album's quite good for those of you who like the likes of simple plan, POD, and the other punk rock bands lah. but that particular song's really nice.)
Book i'm on: (2 actually; 1. Confucious Jade, 2. An artist's potrait, as an old man)

i intend to read this evening, and the only thing that would disrupt this, is the phone. i might talk to some people, but if otherwise, don't think i would communicate with others online, or pretty much do anything else. should i take coffee?

yay, tomorrow's a public holiday, which means, i get to sleep late. something i have not done in a really long long long long time. it's not about the number of hours i sleep, it's just not having to wake up to a disgustingly early morning.

------------------------------------------------
The Reason

i'm not a perfect person,
there's many things i wished i didn't do.
but i continue learning,
i never meant to do those things to you,
and so i have to say before i go,
that i just want you to know,

i found a reason for me,
to change who i used to be,
a reason to start over new,
and that reason is you.

i'm sorry that i hurt you,
it's something i must live with everyday.
and all the pain i put you through,
i wished i could take it all away,
and be the one who catches all your tears,
that's why i need you to hear,

i found a reason for me,
to change who i used to be,
a reason to start over new,
and the reason is you...

and the reason is you,
and the reason is you,
and the reason is you..

i'm not a perfect person,
i never meant to do those things to you,
and so i have to say before i go,
that i just want you to know.
i found a reason for me,
to change who i used to be, a reason to start over new,
and that reason is you.
i found a reason to show,
a side of me you didn't know,
a reason for all that i do,
and the reason is you.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Hands

If I could tell the world just one thing
It would be that we're all ok
And not to worry 'cause worry is wasteful
And useless in times like these
I won't be made useless
I won't be idle with despair
I will gather myself around my faith
For light does the darkness most fear
My hands are small, I know
But they're not yours, they are my own
But they're not yours, they are my own
And I am never broken
Poverty stole your golden shoes
It didn't steal your laughter
And heartache came to visit me
But I knew it wasn't ever after

We'll fight, not out of spite
For someone must stand up for what's right
Cause where there's a man who has no voice
There ours shall go singing

My hands are small I know
But they're not yours, they are my own
But they're not yours, they are my own
I am never broken

In the end only kindness matters
In the end only kindness matters

I will get down on my knees, and I will pray
I will get down on my knees, and I will pray
I will get down on my knees, and I will pray

My hands are small I know
But they're not yours, they are my own
But they're not yours, they are my own
And I am never broken

My hands are small I know
But they're not yours, they are my own
But they're not yours, they are my own and I am never broken
We are never broken
We are god's eyes
God's hands
God's mind
We are god's eyes
God's hands
God's heart
We are god's eyes
God's hands
God's eyes
We are god's hands
We are god's hands

--------------------------------------------------

this two songs are the ones i really like now, don't ask me why only now that i like 'hands' i just like the lyrics. no need to report a reason huh. =)
i'm going to shower now, i badly need it, and i'll settle into a comfortable reading position on my bed, one that wouldn't harm my eyes any further, and no i don't read lying down. =p
talk to you later if i do, whoever you may be.
i'm hoping, but yeah, hope's what gets life going when the going gets to life.
night earth.

i'm lost, but i ain't so sure i want to find out where i'm supposed to be headed.

i'm lost with regards to why i do what i do anymore, especially in the activities that once meant so much to me. i think they still do mean quite a bit to me, but i question why no longer as much. maybe i should just stop questioning.

friends are probably the best things that have happened to me, and at times like these, i don't know why i no longer want to talk about anything to anyone anymore. for now, i'm contended with typing this crap out here, listening to slower but nice music, get a good shower, and then hide under my quilt to 'sleep'.

is it my refuge? why have i been reduced to such waste? well, taking into consideration that i was never much of an accomplishment to be proud of to begin, who am i to complain.. maybe i'll talk less, much much less, and run more, much much more.

smile, i wish i could do that to you, whoever 'you' may be. it's hard, but it's not impossible. it's not.
i know things, yet there's much more i don't.

and yes, i do still love.
night.

did you know that 'i' has 32meanings? or rather, that letter alone represents 32 things. check it out at www.dictionary.com
hahaha. hmmm.. i was walking a 20min walk into CDC before my bike prac, and i was talking to Him. i'm thankful i did. i cleared some stuff out of my head, and i'm glad i know where i stand now, where i have to go.

laters people.

ps: ly, this wasn't the latest entry i was referring to. haha. hope you have fun in church.

i won't say i'm elated, but i must say that i'm happy you've made up your mind. at least now you know you're on one side of the fence and not the other. be glad you're no longer sitting on the fence, that hurts.
whatever the consequences might be, be mindful that you have to live with it now. don't fret though, because the future's unknown, and there's still hope!

it may seem bleak from here, it happens from time to time, even though you've made your decision now.
it's like preparing for your latest big exam, which was the Os. hahaha, you slogged so hard for it, and on the afternoon that you take your last paper, your journey home seems weird. it feels as though you're missing something, but you soon realise the meaning of that feeling. be happy about it, and start to smile, it does more than make you feel better at that moment in time.

your friends are there for you, and if i'm included in that circle of people, then yes, i'm there for you too. i want to be, and i'm waiting for the second green light you could consider giving. do you remember the first? haha. =)
i'm pondering on the issue of being frank with you, but i'm reminded that some things need not to be said. in her words, you probably already know, but it's not the right time to talk about it now, so i'll leave it as that for now. let me know in your own ways when you're good to talk, and i'll be more than glad to share with you what i would like to tell you. =)

----------------------------------------------

i'm in the midst of constructing my study schedule. hahaha, yes, i'm pretty revved up about my studies now, esp since i've not done my tutorials properly up till this point in the week.
i hope to get back on track, i hope for alot of things, but it would be nothing more than hope if i don't do anything about it.

i'm going for my bike prac now, 2BL4. hahaha, 4 more lessons before i can register for my test date. cleared my theory section already, now need to book a date for my RTT, hope i can clear that too.
alright now, take care all on this warm wednesday afternoon.

the world of opposites

in someone's words, the people who smile the most in the day are those who cry the hardest at night.

if i was given a choice, i think i would rather smile in the day and cry at night. at least then i know that in the course of the day, i brought joy to some with the smile i wore. it's fine with me that i cry at night, cause it would be to myself and Him, and the best part, He won't forsake me.
thanks for the sound advice you gave with regards to my mother, very simple, but very true. haha, leave her alone, angry/pissed/agitated mothers are individuals who see no other logic but theirs at that moment, so yeah, just stay clear.

------------------------------------------

i'm glad we're talking, i really am.
"maybe the next lunch we have wouldn't be that awkward anymore" quipped someone, and i couldn't help but smile at that hope.
it's amazing how hope gets you through life.
at the end of the day, should this friendship fall away with time, i would still thank you for having been part of a friendship that i once experienced hope, because it would have helped make me who i would be then.

night earth

acceptance makes it all easier

to tell you i accept all that's happening, i would be lying.
to tell you i want no more or less than what's going on in my life, i wouldn't be truthful.

let me know how i can go about telling you the truth, and then maybe we'll make something beautiful work out of this.

a need and a want

what i want, may not be what i need.
that's something i've been told ever since i starting wanting things, those that my parents thought i didn't need.

being who i want to be.
being who i need to be.
i'm having a hard time choosing even though it's only two choices i have.

i value my friendships, and they need time, but because of my 'high strung jc life' as my mom puts it, the things i value in life are no longer getting their fair share of time.
i'm definitely the weakest at home nowadays. i sleep the most, yet i'm always the most tired. i'm always having a weak stomach nowadays, and in the past 4 months, i've fallen sick more than all three of them add up together. that's quite disgusting. hmmm, i don't know if there's anything i can do about it.
i leave for school when the sky's dark, i return when the sky's darker.
i stay in school to finish up my tutorials, and although i'm at pace with the current syllabus, i haven't even started studying, and i'm already so pressed for time.
someone commented that she thinks i'm someone who doesn't prioritise these things like friendships above my studies and work, and i felt ironic.
i felt that i know deep down within me, i did and still do value them, but yeah, i can't act out what i feel, simply because i'm who i am in the many areas i'm invovled in like school and church.
if you're feeling lost reading this entry halfway, don't fret, i'm feeling lost writing it too. there's no particular point i'm trying to make today.
i failed my last gp essay again, i'm getting quite sick of it.
i'm getting sick of failing all my tests, and that's precisely why i'm going to get up at 530am tomorrow morning to do my math revision and practise before leaving for church at 730am. then i'll come back in the afternoon to go at my math again.
i'm sick of having people look at me or rather at the badge i wear and smirk away.
i'm sick of falling below expectations, that's why i chose to volunteer myself for CTC, and especially as the logistic officer in the comm, even though i have no inkling as to what's needed of logistics.

i ain't hiding that i'm a troubled youth nowadays.

i want to continue to lose weight so i can get out of taf, and remain healthy, but i don't even have time anymore to go for my daily runs.
i must admit that taf has helped me gain much of my stamina back, i clocked 10m32s for my 2.4km run on monday morning, but yeah, it's irritating having to report for your own health don't you think? that's why i'm going to push myself harder, further, and to a point that i collaspe if need be, so long i can prove it to myself, no one else but myself.
i'm back on Hydroxicut, and thanks to a promotion, i got a good deal for 280pills. hope the longer period of consumption would have better effects with the extra work i'm going to make my body do.

tomorrow's going to be a good day in church, and i thank Him for that.
it's going to be a day where i ask Him to show me what i should do, and i ask of obedience to follow suit.

night earth.

happy moments in life

sometimes, when the going gets tough, or it's been really dry, someone just comes along, maybe talks to you for just a short while, and it all seems much better, because you're happy =)

yes i am happy tonight, i ain't going to hide it.

thanks for talking to me, i liked it alot. =)

** the clearest way you show someone you love them, is when you give them your time, because that's what you really own at the end of the day. your life ain't yours, it's His, so yeah, whilst you're here, you've probably got your own time as yours, truly yours. so be wise with your time, and tell people you love them when you do =)

good night earth =)

The act or process of gradually declining or diminishing

ever wondered why you stopped drinking milk as a kid? and went on to solid food? or even better, why your mother stopped breast feeding you? (putting the bio aside) and moved you on to milk powder?

you grow stronger as you wane yourself off the things you need. as a young infant, you needed milk, and look at the hell a kid can give you when he's not given his fair share of milk? wouldn't you agree that you needed it quite badly then?
move on to the time you started eating from a plate/bowl of your own? where your parents would dish you a small portion of whatever solid food they ate like chicken rice? or some veg?
apart from the literal intake of sustenance, ask yourself what else happened?
you grew to be a stronger being wouldn't you say so?

in that light, maybe i should wane myself off the things i hold dear to my heart, the things i 'need' per se, like my friends? the time spent on the phone with my close friends? the time i give to myself? the space given to me?
it might make me a stronger person, but it would definitely be painful and lonely. it's a chance i'm taking against a known fact. and we wonder why we take risk huh.. haha.

i don't know, you guys tell me, i'll let you all decide.
maybe i'll regress into the life of an old grumpy hermit, a curmudgeon.

how lessons are learnt

only the hard way.
face it, we don't learn unless we go through it ourselves, and prove the theories right, that we gain our experience, and that we can proclaim we have learnt.
if you're not doing something because someone told you it's wrong, and therefore you don't get hurt, burnt or gain something out of that matter, then you cannot say you've learnt your lesson, because you never went through it.

we all know as head knowledge that words can hurt, especially when you don't think about what you say. and the meaning of that is never real untill someone hurts you with what they say. a simple act of loving kindness never seems warm untill it's done unto you by someone you don't know, someone who loves you for the very basic humanitarian reason of being a fellow human being.

our parents tell you that dating young has no good to it, cause you would probably not work out, you would make stupid decisions, and you would end up hurt.
if you're one of those who've chose not to date because of what your parents tell you, good for you that you've listened to them. no questions. just a nod of approval that you obey them.
for those of you who've tried, and if what your parents have said came true, then good for you that what they said came true. it makes them even more credible as parents right? but you see guys and girls, you have experience to fall back upon, and the next relationship you step into, whether it works out or otherwise, you would see that you indeed have grown, (i seriously pray you have!) especially in your mental capacity of handling certain issues. what seemed like a dream in that last relationship would seem more real now since you're older, and you're even closer to the harsh realities of life. take marriage for example. when you're 16, it seems so far away, but when you're 26, it's a different story isn't it? that's what i call growth.

learn your lessons well, don't waste your time trying to unlearn them. there's no way to do that. and last but not least, be thankful for those lessons learnt. they all contribute to making you who you are.

thank you.

night earth

reflections on a choice

do you ever reflect about some choices you make?
don't be too quick to answer, because more often than not, i guess our answer that we give ain't the truth.
like it or not, i don't know for everyone, but i know that i do think about the choices i make. i would always go 'what if.... ', get the picture? and that's why i meant by reflecting on my choices. it doesn't have to be a session in which i sit myself in a dark corner of your room, in silence and solitude and think and cry about it. it only has to be the very thought of the decision. whether you made the choice in the first place, whether you made the choice you really wanted? etc?

the most ambiguous choice i made for myself recently is getting at me. i didn't include certain details, and it's left me some loopholes. and trust me, i don't know what to do about these faults in my supposed fool-proof decision/arguement for myself.
i said that things would remain status quo, and it meant the common understanding that we had as friends, but i didn't spell out to you or myself whether i was going to shut it out from within. i didn't make the decision a few weeks back then, and i ain't so sure as yet whether i wish to make it now.
i'm still pondering about whether it's worth the time, and it's still a positive answer. not 'it' as in the friendship per se in particular, but i guess every aspect of it? it's you. you as a figment of memory even if for a while, you as someone seen along the corridors, you as a fellow being existent in yourself. yeap.
trust me when i say i'm happy because you say you are. i really am =)

---------------------------------------------------------------------

just got back from LE. God spoke to me, in a very new way i guess. Pastor Rony was speaking of His book, but he crafted the service's message in a way that spoke very much to me. it was about leadership, and something that he said made my thoughts stop straying and wondering.

'the higher you climb, the more lonely you get, and that's the toughest price you pay in leadership. but for a leader who's got God, it's a different ball game altogether. it's about learning to appreciate being in solitude with God, when you realise that high up there, everything else fades but God. so the more lonely you become, the more real God's presence becomes."

it wasn't said in those exact words, but that's the gist of it.
that's probably why i don't make friends easily anymore, and maybe it's an answer to why the friendship i hope to have with you ain't going the way i would have wished it went? not that i was ever an amiable person to begin with, but i'm working at it. i am. trying, tough!
i'm glad for my friends. i really am. i'm not only glad, i'm thankful.

i still seek Your peace Lord.

it's a day that would be jam packed with work! fast and furious i must go! but i'll rest first. my mini 'quest' of work starts at 130pm!
take care all for now.

*i hope i get to go to the supermarket today after dinner

choices

why i chose

i chose because i had the choice.
i acknowledge,
that i was made in the very essence of choice;
the choice He made,
the one to love me.
i was,
and still am given choice,
and i exercise it with frivolity,
but i yearn,
for the discernment,
that i may choose in accordance to will.

-----------------------------------------------------------

i'm in school, and i'm here because i chose to come.
i told some that i might not come today, because i was feeling crappy.
i don't deny the presence of melancholy or depression, but i ain't going to let it overwhelm me, not for today at least, since it's my longest day in school, and also because i need to be at my best whilst i'm in school.

i've learnt in the midst of thinking that the things in your life which you have a say in, those that you can make a choice in, are those that matter most to you.

the tutors you get who teach you don't matter as much as the subjects that you choose to study.

the presence of evanglism doesn't matter at all till you choose to listen to any of it.

the friends, and people you hold close to your heart matter because you chose to allow them to be close to your heart.

those who walk around in school or in town, they may even rub shoulders with you, step on your toes, but they don't matter do they? since you chose to not let it affect you for a long time.

choose wisely is what many people would tell you from their own experiences, but when the wisdom of the world will be put to shame by the foolishness of God, what hope is there in thinking that i might be able to make a 'wise' choice then?

Lord, help me choose, not wisely, but let me then exercise the choice that you've freely given in line with what you wish of me.

as promised

He is faithful to those who are faithful to Him.
All good things come from Him.

i just came home from calvary AOG church.
small family church, but as i mentioned to someone else earlier on, nevertheless a church of God.
warmth available from a family church never gives way for the top class performance of a mega church in the likes of CHC, NCC, FCBC etc..

i was talking to Constance throughout most of the play, and i shared with her what really was bugging me.
helped move furniture from 2nd floor of the church to the 3rd after the play for an hour, and i'm glad i did. i helped with a willing heart =)
managed to talk to her after that.
we talked things out, and i'm really thankful!
a weight's lifted off, and i've learn things tonight. will continue learning, but do teach me yeah?

good night earth.
**one of those nights, i put a 'good' there. =)

-just showered-

the wind blows strongly in the estate, i expect downpour later on.
hope it comes either after or before i make my way to calvary AOG.

contact lenses feel good. haven't worn them in two days now. maybe it's cause my eyes got the rest they needed.
i'm wondering whether i should pool after the play. it will be late, but not that i really care.

haha, will make another entry later on when i get back.

learn with me

i ain't no prince of royal blood,
i ain't no successor to the throne.
but don't discount this friendship we have,
for it's even more precious to me than silver or gold.

i don't ask that you be my friend if you don't want to.
i'm asking that you befriend me for me.
please i ask, learn to love me for me,
learn with me, to accept me, for it's something i still have not grasp.

--------------------------------------------------

Good Friday wasn't so good afterall. although i got to watch a pleasant show with nice company, and a good dinner with people whom i'm thankful for. i dread having to wake up early in the morning for school.. sigh.

night earth.

good morning to Good Friday

'Bette Midler - From a distance' in the background

good morning to all of you out there. =)

i had a good night's rest, and it was only cause i worked out well last night. but here's the update of the injury list.
-left wrist is still hurting
-injured my left small finger, kinda sprained it
-and my calves are aching, although they're much better from yesterday's cramps
-headache's gone, thankfully, but my head is still throbbing with thoughts

----------------------------------------------------------

there's only a certain amount to which you can shut things out. that limit varies from individual to individual. and i know my threshold ain't high.
it doesn't take much of a big problem with regards to something i hold close to my heart to make me disarrayed, to make me feel i have to do things to keep my mind off thinking of the problem.
it is worse when thinking does nothing to help because things need to be done, but it takes two to clap, and if i keep trying whilst the other person just doens't want to do something, i'm swatting air, and that equates to nothing.

the goodness of Good Friday can't be marred with trivial problems as such. trivial, nah, not to me.
when the things you deem most worth your time, those that keep you going even when the going gets tough, start to crumble before you, i believe you would start panicking. and even if it's your graduation day, your wedding, or a special day to that extent, you would be affected right? well, that pretty much explains my stand now.

i'm still pondering about sat.
maybe i shouldn't think so much, it would help sometimes?

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good music gets me feeling better on the move especially when i waste 25mins on each trip to and fro school when i can get there in 15-20mins on private transport, that's why i'm so looking forward to clearing my QRL test, then i'll start biking around. yay!
but not to digress, here's what i think good music is.

Norah Jones - Come away with me
Planet Shakers - Rain Down
Maroon 5 - Songs about Jane
Vertical Horizon - Everything you want
Diana Krall - The girl in the other room

this are albums, not just single tracks. i basically listen to christian, jazz, and good alternative music now. and if i've got a radio, it's 92.4Fm. music, i'm thankful for it.

a tribute to Phil 4: 6-7

i seek the peace i once had,
the peace that once lived within me.
it pulsated along with my heart beat,
and if felt warm to just know of it's presence.

i seek the peace i once had,
in the innate knowledge that black could never be white.
it was something inside me then,
but it's lost, and i'm seeking it.

help me Lord to find thy peace once again,
in which i can consult your wisdom from time to time.
let me rest in thy presence once again,
help me find that peace that i may seek no more.

ramblings about many issues: don't be surprised if you're lost halfway

just had dinner with my family =)
ate the same thing i had for dinner last night, but if i love it, who cares? hahaha

convo over the food was interesting.
church politics, family ties, and behavioural matters were discussed, but thankfully nothing too heavy that i couldn't ingest my food.
i learnt that my dad survives on one meal a day. dinner. i'm seriously wondering how he goes about doing that. is it true that the older you grow the less you need?

--------------------------------------------

i seriously think i need to learn to actively exercise restraint.
i'm passionate about the things i love, and like for that matter, and i'm telling you, friendships are one thing that i'm quite mad about =)
i ain't kidding, and i thank God for my friends.
but i think i've more or less learnt that friendships need time like everything else, and although some may spark off to great friendships in the shortest time possible, i have understood that one doens't represent all. i may be really excited about getting to know someone much better, thus i'm highly enthusiastic about communication, but i guess if it's not reciprocative in nature, then it turns that person away.

i've learnt this not once, but 1.5 times. haha, if you're wondering, come ask me about it, i should tell you if i know you well enough.

i had enough of my current emotional state, and i'm sick of it! yes i am! i yearn for what i used to have, the peace (Phil 4: 6-7) that i used to have when i was disciplined to study the Word, and to talk to Him everyday. i'm going back to it, and yes, i miss the instantaneity of whether certain issues were worth the mentioning, or whether i had the right to make some right decisions. they often involve making decisions of feelings towards friends, and how i should handle diplomatic issues, but i miss them.

-----------------------------------

enough of play for at least the near future. i need to stomp out my 'life'.
it's time to plunge into the books. the grades are disgusting. O F F.
hmmm.. yeah, and if you're going 'tsk tsk' since i'm the p, i'm telling you, i've went 'tsk tsk' at myself more than you can imagine. that's why i didn't particularly enjoy this weekend that was supposedly set aside for 'relaxation and rejuvenation.
it's ok, cause i've got some nice ups to ease out the downs that the weekend has brought about.
------------------------------------

Holy Week
something i've never really observed, but it would be a new experience this week. i want to go through it =)
let me know if i can pray for you. let me be a soul who can speak to God on your behalf simply because He's happy when we as His children talk to Him. don't deprive yourself of that simple pleasure, and let's enjoy it together if we can find the right time and place to pray together =)

------------------------------------

things to look forward to this week:
1. tues bike practical - 200mins of solid biking, cause i booked two lessons in a row! hahahaha
2. Seow's birthday - a brother i still thank the Lord for very much, although we haven't been speaking.
3. the short days of the school week, esp the friday.
4. the observation of Holy Week, which would include a study of the material i recieved today from church
5. Good Friday Story play down in a church somewhere along upper east coast road. i still can't recall the name of that church, must!
6. good music, mocha milk, and good time spent with friends as and when i interact with them, by His grace!

shower time again! (did i mention i like showering?)
tut time.
night earth.

little things that mean lots

when i got that sms from angelina, i was elated. it was during econs lecture, and to see her name appear on my cellular once again, i felt warm all over. i miss her lots.
she's gone back to indo, but she'll be back again soon, hope we do get to go out and catch up..
--------------------------------------------
when that call got through, and though it was a brief 10-15mins we spoke, i'm glad i got to speak to her.

-------------------------------------------

looking forward to go for the classical piano concert in july (imagine watching a 92yr old play the piano with all that experience), and the nearer one would be the good friday play. hmmm.. seriously, i haven't really been to any play of this sort, only acted in one, the one that KPC put up in our church, about 3-4years ago?

hahaha, those were the days, when we were all younger. i wonder how my stage crew mates are all doing now. how those dance girls are doing now. come to think of it, one of them's my neighbour, 4blocks away, i wonder how she's doing.

-------------------------------------------

it's been a really pleasant day.
played pool with a new friend.
had a good dinner with my brother.
watched 'Love Actually'.
talked to nice people.
drank chocolate milk.
and smiled throughout most of the day.

night earth =)

without my wrists, lots i can't do!

hey hey clare! you're not the only one who's disappointed about not being able to go watch the team go play HCJC.
if not for the CIP thingy, i would go, but yeah, circumstances don't allow it, so oh well. hahaha
i need sleep, i need water, and i need rejuvenation!
hahaha

night earth

random thoughts, a result of my surroundings there and then

the apathetic

i have a sigh of relief,
i start to breathe once again.
my sense of touch is awakened to the sensations again,
those once felt when i had more sense in my head.
The spinal nerves have not broken down,
it's just that i choose to ignore the screams the signals are transmitting.
the wrist is swollen,
but the heart in it's hope is wilted.
logic in the mind seems something to look forward to,
but it is still another subject of time.

------------------------------------------

as mentioned in my last entry, i'm a friend. it won't be easy, in fact i think it's the hardest thing to be to anyone, but i guess that's why i take up this challenge to myself willingly, because it's a selfless decision. it's not about me, it's about you.

to the people who are friends to me:
you all have been great! i'm not kidding! =)
wJ (the queen!; Her Royal Highness!!! =p), lump (my scandalous gf and princess), izzy (piglet), Cy, jHan, Handi, Yy, ange, chun, aloy and hailing, jerome, christina (my scandalous darling), val tock (my beautiful, sexy, adorable, lovely, and superb sis), i salute you people!

i know i don't talk to you all most of the time, not all the time anyway. i can't. i have 24 hours like you all do, but please do not understate the value of your name appearing here. it's with true respect and appreciation that i type your names out =) (sounds like a memorial wall)
i'm thankful for the times that i do talk to you all! let's not let them go like that.
i'm going to tag less emotions -at least the negative ones- to my entries. i want you people who read to know that i'm happy thinking the way and amount i think. i'm happy the way i'm writing, and i'm happy being happy for you all =)

take care all for now