true, you would be happy if you got what you want, but happiness is wanting what you have..

Lord, help me be contented with what you put in my life every single moment. help me appreciate and acknowledge that it's all there for a reason, and that all things should and must point back to you.

had a great session with my kids this morning, and i'm sure it was heavy going, but i know what's tough would only make you stronger. we will grow together as we continue to learn from each other in the intellectual sparring that will take place as we study God's word =)

it's been.. long i guess? but then again, i don't think i owe anyone this, so here goes the random snippets of what's been happening, and what's been going through my mind.

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caught batman and initial D in two weekends, both were ok.

been thinking or rather feeling alot about some stuff, but haven't really came to any conclusion, so that's it for now.

and i spent the day eating lunch and dinner at cartel. don't ask me why it happened, it just did.

what's it say about this person if he/she:

-is who you wanna tuck into bed every night even if it means only being able to do it over the phone
-is the person you wanna call up even though you don't feel like saying a single word
-is the one's who's text message you're ever eager to reply
-is the very reason why you feel you need to set things straight every time it goes outta place, be it with yourself, or when it's an issue between the two of you

i'm just asking the question, i've yet to come up with an answer to it. help me along would you?

words.. at times they mean so much. but it's precisely when they hold such value, that their absence can also make thus great a difference.

gosh.. miscommunication is bad.. big time.

should i allow myself to claim that i'm depressed? would be just be choosing the easy way out?

yes may day's been special, but more than in one way. it shall remain between you and i.

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due to the nature of my uniform, i've been doing alot of ironing, and over time, i've been reminded time and again by something a preacher once mentioned.

'my favourite household chore is ironing, cause when i do it, i get talk to God, and also straighten things out'

it happened for me this weekend too. had to settle an issue, and although i didn't get it straighten out till the very last min, i'm still glad i did.
it's back to camp for another week.

this may day's been special for me.

i thank God for you.

i'm happy.

haha I think I probably just experienced the slackest 2 days of my life in MIDS. Seniors aren’t around, no officers are around (apart from Chan YS being around for swimming yesterday along with TCO – he rocks man seriously- who actually bianged him) and the best part, the training schedule is light. Well, I hope this long weekend would be a good time to recharge for the following week, where the pace is only going to get faster with many more tests, lessons and IPPT on Friday. Hope the asics come in by then so that I can use it to run my 2.4km.

on a positive note, I realized that the FNOs are actually quite nice people, and not a secluded lot of midshipmen. They’re actually quite open with guys, and I still hold unto the view that my NS life would never be what it would be without interaction with FNOs. They’re starting to term me as one of their jiemei again, just like in JC, man.. hope the good things happen, without the negative complications. Argh.. *shrugs, that was a bad experience

my my my, 7 days just flew by like that. Man…. It’s been an interesting week thus far. Had our first OOD rounds, and also the first fire drill, which was conducted by an officer, CPT Alan Seah to be exact. He’s a nice guy, I managed to clear my ROR re-test because of him. Guess I would be serving my 4wp this weekend after all, but since Atzel’s fine with doing so too, don’t see a problem anymore.

A revelation about trust, the trust part isn’t what I’m jubilated about, but rather the fact that you wished for me to be there at times when you’re sad.
To want to have someone by your side when you’re happy, you seek that person to share the joy. To want that same person by your side when you’re down, you seek that person for comfort, in hope to lessen your pain. Ask, and I promise I’ll try my best to be there.

Well, I think I shall sleep proper tonight, since my next two days will be slack, moreover it’ll be a long weekend, so hopefully I’ll fully recharge =) till I meet you, I miss you =)

I’m MOD today, and i hope nothing goes wrong. The night’s rest was quite disrupted with the heat and the many times that I was awaken by coughing and people coming into my room. Well, it’s ok, at least the night ended off on a piece of good news =)

I’m off to 7 lessons of fixing with LTC Deepak today then there will be a IPPT trial test in the afternoon of which I would not be a part of because of ATT B status, thankfully to a great extent.


Well, something did happen on my MOD day, had to write a statement in the end, but that’s not what this entry’s about.

I just finished playing pool with shaun, used my 4k1 for the first time. Played well, enjoyed his company too. Didn’t talk much though.

Neither is this entry about pool. Just felt like updating that I had a talk with J.Beckman and roy hoong, they’re NSF like myself, and I guess some of my batch div mates are starting to see some issues in a way that I would, or maybe it should be the other way round, I seeing it in their view. Oh well, I’m enjoying this shore leave thus far. Hope things turn out fine for the upcoming week.

Got quite abit of stuff to buy, hopefully will get to settle them all asap.

I’m on 4 days ATT B status. Not something I’m really happy about, but at least the last thing I have to worry about for the next 4 days is fatigue due to physical strain. My chest is hurting mildly as I breathe in hard, I think it’s the work of the phlegm that’s stuck in my nasal passage, and maybe cause I’m coughing too. The room is so stuffy, jason’s coughing, and without ventilation, I’m not surprised I’ve caught the virus too. They’re at the pool having SPT1, I don’t think it’ll be a problem for me to clear that exercise/test but I’m just not in the mood today I guess.

Learnt quite abit on chart work today, and it’s really fun =) at least I’m beginning to see the interesting portions of navigation rather than just boring theory work.

I spoke to you last night, and I’m happy that you’re glad with what I said to you, as I was glad we even talked. =) hmmm… won’t be seeing you this weekend, hope I get to the next weekend though, it’s a long one cause of labor day. Heheh, can I ask you out on a date then? =p

Well, tonight we’re going to have our first night classes of 3 this week, and it’s actually the first night training we’re having thus far in MIDS. Hope it’ll be good, maybe we’ll even get to go in admin attire. Really need to buck up in Mr Jaya’s lesson, since there’s a test this sat on it.

spent the morning in church, thankful I did, although I didn’t really interact with my kids. Spent the time studying for my navigation’s test tomorrow. Had lunch with a jem, bryan, Christian, steph, and some others. They stayed for 2 meetings – welfare and camp timetable respectively- whilst I was in the other room studying once more for my test. Took a nap in the early evening before having dinner alone, and met up with Roger to come back to SAFTI.

The night is ‘young’, it’s 2312 at the moment, and more than half the wing is still very active. It’ll probably stay this way till about 0100. I’m targeting to sleep latest by 0200, so till then, I have quite a bit of stuff to settle.
journal entry about SEA-EX
study for navs one more round
help Jason type out the required info
talk to God
get 3 hours of sleep =)

somethings you just have to set straight before moving on, and i'm glad i did do so with God and myself.

thankful for whatever's happened during this liberty break, checking back in to reality soon. two exams this week, i hope i clear them, esp the comms one.
looking forward to more of whatever comes. =)

blessed week for you all i hope!

Finally got MS office installed on this after the week in camp without any programs at all. Hmmmm… so much happened today.

Well, it was a mini confession on your side telling me you do like me, and I’m glad you shared. I’m not floating, but I’m definitely happy =) and I seriously hope you liked the flower.

I spent some time playing pool with my brother and I didn’t really enjoy it cause the balls were in bad condition and the table’s kinda overused for the day, collected too much moisture after a whole day of being used I guess.

Spent A LOT of money today. Bought coffee, things like my thermal water bottle, and most of all, placed my $350 deposit for my predator 4k1. It’s coming on Monday, but I ain’t going to collect it till a month later when my next pay comes in, then I’ll go collect it. It’s not going to run away anyway. =p going to church in a few hours time, and I still have not really studied, planning to catch some sleep, get up at 0600, start studying for a while, then proceed to church, after which I would come home and mug. Planning to reach camp latest by 2045, then can start preparing my uniform etc, and finish up one more round of mugging hopefully before we end the night.

I spent some time playing pool with my brother and I didn’t really enjoy it cause the balls were in bad condition and the table’s kinda overused for the day, collected too much moisture after a whole day of being used I guess.


Spent A LOT of money today. Bought coffee, things like my thermal water bottle, and most of all, placed my $350 deposit for my predator 4k1. It’s coming on Monday, but I ain’t going to collect it till a month later when my next pay comes in, then I’ll go collect it. It’s not going to run away anyway. =p going to church in a few hours time, and I still have not really studied, planning to catch some sleep, get up at 0600, start studying for a while, then proceed to church, after which I would come home and mug. Planning to reach camp latest by 2045, then can start preparing my uniform etc, and finish up one more round of mugging hopefully before we end the night.

by the way, for those of you who have been checking for updates, i'm sorry this one came after so long. i've been really busy thus the lack of updates. thanks for caring though, hope you all are doing fine. =)

just something child-like and cute i came across:

i ran up my door, opened up the stairs.
said my pajamas and put on my prayers.
turned off my bed, and tumbled into my light,
all because he kissed me good night.

Though the cover is worn
And its pages are torn
with places where there’s traces of tears

Yet more precious than gold
Is this book worn and old
That can shatter and scatter our fear

As I prayfully look
Into this precious old book
Many treasures and pleasures I see

Many promises of love
From my father above
Who is nearest and dearest to me

This book is a guide
A friend by my side
It will lighten and brighten my day

And each promise I find
Truth will gladden my mind
As I preach it and teach it each day

To this book I will cling
Of the words I will sing
Though many corpses and losses be mine

But I cannot despair
Though surrounded by care
By possessing this blessing divine

Great God we praise on all Your works I look
Yet Your wisdom, power and grace
Shine brightest in this book

The stars are in the heavenly row have much instruction given
But only your word instruct my soul
On how to get to heaven

i'm back from camp once again, but the different thing is, i'm only left with one major event in training, that being my 24km route march. we're done with all the other route marches, the sitest, live range, field camp, hand grenade, etc etc.

i'm 2 weeks from POP, after which i'll go where God puts me =)

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so much has happened, seriously, but it's all being recorded either in memory, words or even pictures. well, the time would come where all can be savoured as the past. trust me, that day would come, because i've got faith in that happening myself. take that step with me? =)

let there be faith, love, truth, and most importantly, Your presence Lord in what is to come between us..

-like the ends of a pearl necklace hold together, let me clasp my hand in yours-

so much sharing, warmth, and revelation. but be warned there will be more. it's not all going to be warm and comfy, there are going to be rocky times, cold wars, and even prolonged periods of silence.

keep in mind that the status quo is nice, and if God so willing, let it stay this way, but knowing the imperfections that are ever so present, be on guard for what can happen.

it's a committment, and it's going to take more effort then just a solo pilot. work at this together, in a way that would allow those invovled to look back, with pride that no problem was dodged but confrotned with boldness and assurance that it would undo itself in God's time, with the comfort that the storm was braced through in each other's company.

-last night-
"maybe we should talk less, use the night for thinking and rest, to be still and know that He is God"

it took me a while to digest the fullness of this, and yes thankfully i was preoccupied. it allowed slow seeping of the possibilities into my mind, after all it was only text.
the conclusion, i'm happy about it for various reasons that would not be mentioned here. =)

-this morning-
it is cny (as much as the lack of activities highly suggest it's just another public holiday that's got nothing to do with us like hari raya etc), so i'm off for visitation.
the dinner last night was .. ok. the food was expensive, but i wouldn't say fantastic, i guess what stood out to me more was that after so many years, we had a complete extended family. that grandpa and big uncle actually sat at the same dinner table, and that we actually said grace before food, i truly see God's hands working in my maternal family. Amen.

i'm off to the paternal side, which i ain't exactly turned on by the idea. imagination and recollection of this people... shudders.. but oh well, i'm pragmatic so i'm going. =p read deep into this. hahaha =p i'm off.

i've got one week off NS, partly cause of a two day MC, and a 5day CNY break. so yeah, that works out to one week.

i'm supposed to be sleeping/resting, but i can't at the moment. it's a warm afternoon, even though i'm in a not-so-cold aircon room. my nose is clogged, and i'm tired.
i'm thinking of doing something to relax, that would be quiet, so gaming's outta the question.
well, i'm going to.... i don't know. i'll figure out.