love gives, and it never takes.

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i'm stepping down tomorrow. i ain't kidding. i don't know what i feel about the stepping down and the delivering of my final speech as the president, or the certificate of thanks that i would recieve, or the final time i would wear my blazer, or the last time i would have teachers sniding me as the pres, but yes i can tell you, i'm feeling so much about something (-one) else.

if all that matters is to meet the objective, does everything else go then? does the end justify the means?
i want to let you know, yes i do. but i'm afraid i would lose it. hold it, what do i have now anyway?
well, i have 9 outta 10 times i don't recieve replies to my smses. i have 9.5/10 times my calls are not picked up.
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i have times when i don't dare to speak to you when you're just seated next to me, and yet i also have the constant hope to see you the moment i look up from whatever i'm doing, in hope to spot your face in the multitude of blue.
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i have a mind that tells me the logic or rather the lack of it of pursuing this matter, but yet i can't explain the fact i haven't been able to severe the thoughts from my being. trust me, i tried, and i don't think it has worked out for the good.
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how it turned out this way, from what it used to be from the very start, i have no idea.
where it goes from here, i have no idea either.
if i choose my desired course of action, neither will i have an idea.
give me a clue, that might help, it might just make things seem clearer.